Things a true Southerner Knows

*Rocking chairs and swings are guaranteed stress relievers.

*Rocking chairs and swings with an old person in them are history lessons.

*The difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit.

*Pretty much how many fish or collard greens make up a mess.

*That "gimme sugar" don't mean pass the sugar.

*When somebody's "fixin" to do something, it won't be long.

*How good a cold grape Nehi and cheese & crackers are.

*Knows what, "Well I Suwannee !!" means.

*When "by and by" is.

*A belt serves a greater purpose than holding Daddy's pants up.

*The differences between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and trailer trash.

*Never to go snipe hunting twice.

*You may wear long sleeves, but you should always roll 'em up past the elbows.

*The difference between "pert' near" and "a right far piece".

*They know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.

*A true Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."

*A true Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is - as in "Going to town, be back directly."

*When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin", you know you're in the presence of a genuine southerner.

**And a true Southerner knows when someone looks at you, shakes their head and says
"Bless your Heart" , what their really saying is "What an Idiot"**